HERE COMES THE SUN.

SUP Y'ALL?!

Toronto was da bomb guys!

Cool things included...

My host Devin Atherton lives 13 steps from the Salvation Army and you know what they called me in another lifetime...





















Psych! I mean THIS lifetime.

I got a DARLING cloche...





















As if being neighbours with Sally Ann isn't awesome enough, Devin lives about 13 times 4 steps from Value Village!
















I won't tell you all about all the great things I found because that would just be lame and boring...but I WILL tell you that the cloche was just the beginning.

OKAY OKAY SO BASICALLY MY SATISFACTORY EXCITING HOODLESS SWEATSHIRT COLLECTION IS NOW MORE THAN SATISFACTORY, IT'S INCREDIBLE.

The best additions to that were found at a VINTAGE DEPOT about 4 steps past my girl Sally Ann.

Devin and his really fun and funny roommate Paul found excellent matching leather jackets there and they were so excited by them that the other lads they lived with were jealous ended up going to get their sweet leather jacket on also and so the boys at the Vintage Depot should definitely give them sweet discounts forever for causing such an uproar over their sweet leather jacket selection.

I am really happy for the lads and their leather so I took pictures of them looking like the Spice Girls eventhough they are actually known as EMERSON DUPLEX if we're going to get real here.
















Seriously though, peep the ORIGINAL.



















As always, CATHOLIC SCHOOL GIRLS RULE and THE SPICE GIRLS are...MUY CALIENTE!


















After Friday's heavy thrift session, I was hungry and POOR despite GREAT BARGAINS.

Luckily, my cousin Mike is not poor and I met him and his girl Bianca and some older guys with real jobs for dinner at what seemed to be a HIP JOINT called Terroni.

The company was surprisingly unintimidating and the calamari was stellar.

And you KNOW what they called me in another lifetime...





















Psych??

Anyways, I was stressed as I boarded the metro at Landsdowne station to make my way to Mike and his crew. I was all of sudden worried I was superlame because my Barbie pink nailpolish was totally chipped and I was wearing sneakers and what the heck do I know about the stock market and life in the real job world?!

Before I knew it I was making arguably innappropriate jokes about fucking B-listers.

So Mike had this partner in crime that looked like someone we all know and love.















I said "YOU KNOW WHO YOU LOOK LIKE?!"

And he was all "I know, I know..."

And I said "Really?? Who..."

And HE said "Jude Law."
















And I almost didn't tell him what I REALLY thought but we had been waiting for a table for awhile, long enough for me to have a few drinks and lose my tact.

I think Jude Law is kind of small and girlish but I'm sure he loves the comparison.

That said, this guy looked just like Carson Daly but he gave this really sweet Scottish homeless man 20 bucks and he didn't even know it was Robbie Burns Day so Carson 2.0 was fine by me.

That didn't stop me from asking him more than once, "So what's it REALLY like fucking Tara Reid..."

I think I made a great impression.

Later I went to Stone's Place where my girl Mansa works and we shooted the shiz and it was really fun eventhough some of the Rolling Stones pictures on the wall are superwack and look like those airbrush photobooth pictures that make the sound of a pencil drawing eventhough they are actually just a robot computer.

Mansa told me Drew Barrymore was there with that guy from that commercial a couple of weeks ago playing pool and then of course we talked about how Drew Barrymore's mid-90s GUESS ads were pretty much the best thing since nothing came between Brooke Shields and her Calvins.






















Drew Barrymore circa GUESS MAGIC was definitely tacked on my wall next to Jason Priestley's Pepe Jeans ads back before I had fully developed breasts.























In regards to this, some may reference our dear friend Virginia Slim by saying, "You've come a long way, baby..."

HowEVER...

I say "GUCCI SMOOCHY!"

Truth be told, although I'll always have a soft spot for pre-breast reduction Drew Barrymore and I actually thought she was totally great in Poison Ivy, my old roommate Caroliner and I definitely had Drew Barrymore in Gucci on our fridge the moment we spotted her doin' the damn thing 2.2 years ago looking like sassy vixen that she is, working it, working it, and WORKING IT.

So Saturday I hit Kensington with my girl PJ and we talked to this drama therapist/owner of store with really great earrings and other funny stuff for long enough that he told us to each pick out a pair for free because we listened to his life story.

He was actually a really cool dude and I'll link his website when I find his card and tell anyone who cares when he's doing his workshops at Concordia in the coming months.

More importantly, here is a sneak peek of the beautiful earrings I chose, as rocked by Devin's roommate Paul without much prompting and THAT is why he totally rules.
















Am I right or am I right?!

Other Kensington highlights include an epic addition to my cowboy boot collection...I now have more than enough cowboy boots to walk on all eights wearing cowboy boots if I were a very large spider and I had a human owner with the same size feet as me in very large spider form.














I don't care if you think they went lame when Sienna Miller said fuck off to boho chic and the peasant skirt.

My sister's Hilary's friend Phoebe's mom is like Captain Vintage of Toronto/The World or something and SHE says that if you're going to go vintage with shoes COWBOY BOOTS IS WHERE IT'S AT because someone else breaks them in and you are left to totally rule in your cowboy boots without having to break them in!

I guess you've waited long enough.

HERE THEY ARE!!!
















To the right of my KILLER BOOTS you'll notice HONEY DIJON MISS VICKIES.

I had one of the best laughs of the weekend when Devin's roommate Dustin kept saying "I bought them for you...but MOSTLY for the house...but mostly for you...but MOSTLY for Devin...but mostly for the house...but MOSTLY for you...but mostly for Devin...but MOSTLY for the house" in continous loop for about three minutes and I don't know if it sounds funny but I was choking and in hysterics over how bloody hilarious it was.

Come on...

Imagine THIS guy saying that.
















Whatever, it was funny.

PJ peer pressured me into another pair of incredible boots (albeit non-cowboy ones) and they are basically all the sexy sweetness of Mia Sara as Sloane Peterson in Ferris Bueller in white leather form with silver studs and SILVER-BEADED TASSLES.

She told me that the vintage gods have blessed me with really cute small feet and I should stop crying about food money and embrace that.
















PJ really wished my Sloane Petersons fit her and she said that she would buy them if I didn't so that in 3 hours when I regretted not buying them, I could buy them from her and it would be no big deal and I should stop crying about food money and embrace that.

What else...

I saw Atonement and it was sexy at times.

I went to a nice restaurant called Bodega with Devin and his sister for his big quarter century feast. It is fancy and pricey but during this thing called Winterlicious (something like it was happening in Montreal a couple of weeks ago) they have a bunch of restaurants that have cheaper meals for country folk like us.

I HAD THE FOLLOWING:
-Roasted Beet Salad (with walnuts and bleu cheese, orange ginger dressing)
-Grilled Salmon Filet (with Provençal vegetables and lentil du puy, tarragon cream sauce)
-Warm Banana Cake (with vanilla ice-cream)

It was great, I guess.

It was also great when Devin tried to help out our already nervous waitress by piling up our plates and putting the bread basket on the floor.

Everyone ELSE thought that this would probably make her MORE NERVOUS and RUSHED and that putting the bread basket on the floor was actually a really weird move that I'm still having a hard time comprehending...

We went to see some stand-up comedians after dinner and it was funny (sometimes).

Then we went to McDonald's because that's the cool thing to do hours after a fancy dinner.

I got a MCFLURRY and the guy behind the counter called everyone "bro" except me.

He then came and said what's up while we were eating and Devin told him it was his birthday and then this kid offered him CRACK and the really weird thing is that he was clearly not joking at all. It was really weird. He asked if we smoked crack and when we said no he said damn shame because he had an extra bag for the birthday bro. It was really weird. And I'm not one to make jokes about crack because I think it's not that funny to say "Are you on crack?!" just because someone is in a silly mood or making poor choices regarding the direction of their life. Just because I'm silly sometimes and sometimes I bounce off the wall, sometimes I hear "OMG! You are SUCH a crack baby Nicola!" which is up there with "gay" and "retarded" on the wall of words that are often used in really lame ways.

JUST TO LET YOU KNOW, NO ONE FINDS THE WORD "RETARDED" (WHEN THROWN AROUND LIKE IT'S NO BIGGIE) MORE IRKSOME THAN MY BOY TED MIRSKY.

Monday I rolled with Ted at his swanky bachelor pad that he can't wait to vacate which is weird because the place came with really great curtains. He called them "the curtains from my grade 5 classroom" and I thought that was really funny but he said that the girl who came and looked at the place earlier totally didn't get it and he was like "Listen...nevermind".

Ted called my sister when I was on the way there and asked her what to buy for us to eat.

She told him I like cheese and PARTY MIX and that is a blatant lie.

Wait, sorry...THAT is a blatant lie.

Ted hooked up the CAMEMBERT and some baguette too and they only had CHEESY PARTY MIX and not the one with SUN CHIPS but we soldiered on and had some Heinekens too and were both really confused about the new labels because everyone likes to rip up paper beer labels and throw them on the ground for the bitchy barbacktress to pick up later when we're busy after-partying at the Holiday Inn so why make these plastic labels you can peel off easily to put on your SNOWBOARD?? Who knows...

I think that I have covered all the relatively amusing/exciting events that were hot in the T.DOT.

I like to leave a little something to the imagination, know what I'm sayin'??





















GOD BLESS PAM ANDERSON AND HER EPIC GOOGLE DRESS.

It's great because I would be NOWHERE without my dear girl GOOGLE IMAGE.












IN CONCLUSION...I had a great time in Toronto, Ontario and thanks to all that made it such a fun time!

Montreal is great but we need more cheap and tasty Carribean eats around these parts.

I STILL LOVE POUTINE THOUGH BUT THE ROTI NEAR DEVIN'S IS BETTER THAN THE ROTI ON ST. LAURENT IN THE CORRIDOR BETWEEN PINE AND PRINCE ARTHUR.

IT'S REALLY NOT THAT EXCITING!!!

THE LATEST LATEST.

My parents came to visit me this past weekend and we went to Walmart and they got me a futon.














Before I had two butterfly chairs only. Butterfly chairs are cool and all but they're not great for watching movies with anyone you like and want to touch sometimes.





















This means watching movies in bed.

Traditionally, beds are places where people sleep and do it in the missionary position for the first time.














Couches are, tradtionally, for sitting on as hors-d'ouevres are passed around, spilling said hors-d'ouevres on, and repositioning cushions/flipping them over in hopes that no ones sees the mess you made when everyone else was busy laughing about how Obamarama is the new Bananarama and you choked and spewed blue cheese/red wine to the left of your left thigh because you hate when people say Obamarama like it's funny and were looking down trying to hide that fact and fit in.







While I think my parents have accepted the fact that it's not that I'd rather have a GIRLfriend, I sometimes think they wonder if my sister and I have rather high standards when it comes to potential male counterparts. Hilary has a steady boy now so all eyes are on me.






















I've been telling them that my life would be a lot less complicated with couch as segue to bed. I've been telling them that I could hang out on my couch with a crush on THREE DIFFERENT OCCASIONS before hanging out in my bed if I had a couch but otherwise, my crush and I can hang out on the butterfly chairs for THREE MINUTES and then move it to the desk and next think you know someone gets a cramp and off to bed we go and wouldn't it be nice if we could just be young and wait awhile??


















Maybe none of that ever happened or maybe it did, but it's true that couches are awesome for sexy teen makeouts















If you think I say "sexy teen" altogether far too much you should talk to my sister or her steady boy because they say it a lot more than I do and they're not even sexy teens anymore either.

The futon is big enough for a tall person to sleep on when it is opened up into bed-form.





















I like to incorporate this picture into my information superhighway travels as often as possible because it's totally awesome, like the airbrushed Skeet Ulrich picture I love so much but don't have the chutzpah to locate right now because this computer on the 9th floor of the Hall building at CON-U hates me.

My dad said "It really is QUITE big. Big enough for a REEEEAL snogfest." I could pretend that he never said that because it's maybe sort of dorky/embarassing but it was funny, and my parents aren't embarassing dorks actually, they are kind of awesome.

We had an incredible meal at this really cute French bistro, Le P'tit Plateau, on Marie-Anne at Drolet and I got this mushroom stuffed salmon that I would like to have again right now and for dessert, poached meringue with crème anglaise called FLOATING ISLANDS and here it is!













We drank good white wine and good red wine also.

It was cool I guess and I felt in a cool mood afterwards so I decided we should go to Korova and visit my old roommate Caroliner but she wasn't there because she was "on vacation" but I didn't know that because I haven't talked to her since we watched Degrassi last week and I cried and acted like I didn't want to ever see anyone again.

Then we went to Pistol and I was like "THIS IS MY FRIEND BEN VERDICCHIO!" and I really wanted a raspberry martini like I had there the night beFORE with my fave city slicker KATIE HERMON but then I remembered we had to eat something if we wanted a drink and we already ate LOTS of GOOD THINGS so that was that.

My dad was excited to tell his poker friends that he went "bar-hopping in Montreal" and my mom probably wasn't as excited but pretended to be because she's cool like that.

I watched this movie New York Stories on Saturday that is THREE LITTLE MOVIES directed by Martin Scorcese, Francis Ford Coppola and Woody Allen.
















I had watched our man Marty's contribution in my Feminism and Art History class on Thursday, where Nick Nolte is SUCH an artist and Rosanna Arquette is soooo over it and wants to be a great artist herself but suspects that Nick Nolte doesn't really give a fuck about her art afterall and maybe he had selfish perv intentions when hiring her as his live-in assistant that gets salary PLUS free LIFE LESSONS (the title of the vignette, written by Richard Price).















I liked Life Lessons and wanted to watch the rest and the second one was cute because Francis and wee Sofia Coppola made it together and you can tell that she was thinking about being a wee one in New York City with parents who are sometimes busy but maybe awesome anyways sometimes.

The kids in this one all had fancy clothes and really great Chanel accessories like really silly hats and there is a let's dress up in my mom's shit tea party scene that's cool but probably not as elaborate as the tea parties in Marie Antoinette which I haven't seen but I hear it's worth watching on mute while eating cake because it's a pretty movie.












The last one was Woody Allen starring WOODY ALLEN and Mia Farrow as engaged people being judged. Woody Allen has an overbearing yappy mother who doesn't think Mia Farrow is that great eventhough Mia Farrow is totally totally great.





















Oh hey there Marc Jacobs ad, RIGHT?!?!

What I watched was pretty funny I guess but sometimes it's annoying to hear Woody Allen whine if you're not in the mood to hear Woody Allen whine.












So I have yet to finish it but it also might have something to do with how I have a hard time watching Woody Allen and Mia Farrow together at a time when I know Mia Farrow thought Woody Allen was just really good friends with her adopted daughter.

Maybe I'm just sensitive or Aunt Flow is in town or whatever.
















Sunday is a great night for lame but awesome 13.5% red wine enhanced by TWIZZLER STRAWS and pizza and Jenga too with Youri and Georgia and BAILE FUNK that MADE THE JENGA FALL OVER because it was TOO EXCITED.




























Turns out Delisio pizza is not as cool as it seems on TV but I was like "PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE MOM I SAW IT ON TV!!!"














And so she bought it for me because it was just that kind of weekend.

Coolest part was when Youri and I went to Nathaniel's and ate more TWIZZLERS and I didn't say it out loud but Nathaniel does not just eat his Twizzlers, he twists them all funny without even really noticing and I thought it was really cool and copied him actually but didn't say so out loud.



















And Youri and Nathaniel played video games and I watched and I was lucky enough to dream in underwater video game format on Sunday night and it was the best and there were pirates too!














I'm going to Toronto any day now (Thursday) until Tuesday so that should be bright.















So I'll wear ski goggles!




















It's going to be my supercool friend Devin Atherton's birthday on Sunday so I guess that means cake.

When Devin was last in Montreal and it was Nathaniel's birthday and I was making Nathaniel a cake, Devin wouldn't let me get a chocolate cake mix, he made me get the vanilla one with rainbow dots because apparently a chocolate cake is a lame birthday cake so I'll keep that in mind but he'll be lucky if he gets any cake at all.
















And Happy Robbie Burns Day (FRIDAY!!!) to anyone that cares, especially Hans Zimnoch and my dad and Sean Connery too, I guess.

You're stuck in the middle (yeah yeah)...and the pain is THUNDER!

Remember the time Casey Affleck and Matt Damon got lost in the desert in that movie where they get lost in the desert? [see: Gus Van Sant's GERRY] Remember how, at times, all you could hear was the crunch of footsteps on the sand for extended periods of time so that you became more certain if you weren't already certain that they were totally totally doomed??










Remember how you weren't laughing because it wasn't funny???

















Well THAT is how I have felt recently and I haven't felt like writing except for intense emo shiz in the beautiful pink argyle diary that I petted occasionally for about 3 years because I thought it was far too pretty to tarnish with emo shiz.



















I decided I should save it for writing really pretty stories about imaginary unicorns and unrequited love. And by that I mean real-life unicorns and perfect love, both VERY REAL PHENOMENONS.



















Last week when I was busy being a downer, my mom told me about this book she was reading called LULLABIES FOR LITTLE CRIMINALS that my brother gave my sister for Christmas where the narrator describes a January day where the sky is "the colour of a light bulb that is not turned on" and the sky does not change colour all day and she does not feel enough energy to do anything
and I was like "OH MY GOD TOTALLY" and she said that I should read it.





















Maybe I will and hopefully it will not be akin to reading THE BELL JAR around age 19 when you're in a new city and feel A LACK OF REAL CONNECTION TO ALL OTHER HUMAN BEINGS because it's like what's up Sylvia Plath, you're my girl, what are you up to these days WAIT A MINUTE you cut your days short and now I feel a bit SAD.





















Sometimes being 22 blows at the dawn of quarter-life crisis.











But it could be worse so when you feel in the depths of despair, I recommend reading about those who have all the regular quarter-life crisis problems:

"Who am I?/What the shit am I going to do with this degree anyways?/Why hasn't anyone nice and awesome and funny fallen in love with me lately?/Where am I going, where have I been?/What's the deal with my problem skin??/Am I irrelevant in the grand scheme of things?/OH MY GOD I THINK I AM FUCK FUCK FUUUUUUUCK!!!"

All the regular quarter-life crisis problems PLUS heroin addiction was a good thing for me to read this week.


















Noelle lent me this collection of Lesley Arfin's diary entries from age 11 to 25 and sometimes I felt like "Shit girl, I know what you mean..." but then remembered I'm not a drug addict so it's easier for me to get over myself and get my shit together than it was for Lesley who had arguably greater setbacks than mine, which are...not worth integrating into the blogosphere as I kind of like to vaguely tell you all about myself and at the same time tell you nothing.


















As for MY real diary, when I was in Ottawa over Christmas, I found my Jasmine from Alladin diary that I got when I turned 8 and wrote in until I was 11, at which point I decided it was kind of lame because it had pink pages and a lock that could be opened by anyone with an IQ over 6.





















I laughed harder than I had in many moons when reading the rants of my youth aloud to my brother and sister (and my brother's girlfriend Victoria aka Tory Tequila and Adam van Koeverden also) and I can assure you that none of it was funny at the time. It was in my 90210 shoebox that I had labelled CHILDHOOD MEMORIES at a time when I thought I was no longer a child when I was actually very much a child eventhough I became a woman when I was 11.





















Anyways, I've been lost in a cloud of lame and when that happens I decide that I loathe everyone and love cardio more than anyone and I do my very best to not to talk to anyone by not answering my phone ever. This is of course completely irrational and self-destructive and I would be better off hanging out with boys who have been around a quarter of a century but (luckily) still make/appreciate handjob jokes with great zeal and also find it endlessly amusing to prankcall eachother while in the same room, sometimes with a megaphone involved which is actually a pretty great joke.













So instead of being anti-social when you're all "living at 22 HEARTACHE AVENUE "hang out with people who are into being silly even if you think you're not feeling silly and eventually you will feel silly for not feeling like laughing at anything, such as simulated sexual aerobics class as instructed by one who puts on your rabbit fur vest upside-down as though it were a loincloth.





















IT WAS FUNNY AND I ADMITTED IT AND FELT MUCH BETTER.

That was last Thursday and I don't think those surrounding me knew how much better I felt in their company but it really turned around a shitty day and I was soon game for moderate consumption of whiskey/cashews and that was basically a miracle.



















In retrospect, other okay things have happened lately like when I went to say whassup to my old roommate Caroliner at the end of her shift at Korova on Friday and THE DJ PLAYED MY SONG.













I was wearing one white glove on my left hand because I am excited.



















Excited about the 25th anniversary edition of THRILLER and I woke up to DON'T STOP THE MUSIC not once last week but TWICE and so I had been thinking about how different life would be for EVERYONE had the opening track of Thriller not been WANNA BE STARTIN SOMETHIN eventhough if you don't know, now you know that Manu Dibango's Soul Makossa is the origin of that epic chant and it has been called THE FIRST DISCO RECORD and so I guess you know that our man JIGGA MAN used it too??





















Apparently Akon puts his own spin on WANNA BE STARTIN SOMETHIN on THRILLER 25 and I'm not that up on thangs because I don't have the internet at home and there is no sound at school so for all I know everyone has heard it ALL and it's like French electro-remixed at loft parties every weekend and it's old news already but I haven't heard it so that should be interesting methinks.



















A fellow named will.i.am is also on THRILLER 25 and has anyone seen Freedom Writers with Hilary Swank??














It's really lame and P.S. I bet P.S. I LOVE YOU is lame too becaue it's the same team and will.i.am did the score for Freedom Writers and it's silly and there's this time when you're like "GUY! THAT IS BASICALLY PASSIN ME BY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?? YOU THINK I DON'T HEAR THAT SHIT?! I HEAR THAT SHIT! LAME! LAME! LAME!"



















So at Korova last Friday I was like "Heyo mister DJ. I know nobody likes a request but I got my one white glove and WANNA BE STARTIN SOMETHIN is a REALLY GREAT SONG and YOU KNOW IT."













I did not think that he would play it and then he did play it at the very end (about 2 minutes later)and I was SO HAPPY and I told him so and I think he was happy that I was happy and he was pleased with my glove also and his friend from his band was telling me how that song was his NON-REQUEST and I kept asking him if he was serious and he wasn't but I thought he was because I believe everything because I trust everyone even though I should know better by now.
















In other news, as I have been feeling over-dramatically irrelevant in recent days, I was actually really glad that someone (Youri Hollier) noticed I wasn't at my usual fave cubicle at the library yesterday and called me to say so and I was also overjoyed that someone (Devin Atherton and some other unidentified funny person) left me a great message that sounded like a made up on-the-spot song that was some heartfelt chanting of my name that made me as happy as I am whenever I hear that epic chant that originated from Soul Mokassa.

So BIG UPS to all the LITTLE THINGS that count MORE THAN YOU KNOW on certain days when you feel superlame.





















In conclusion, I VOW TO GET OVER MYSELF AS MUCH AS ONE WHO DOES SOMETHING AS SELF-INDULGENT AS BLOGGING CAN WITHOUT ACTUALLY EXTINGUISHING SAID BLOG FOR GOOD.

I'm looking into the possibility of a straight A semester and I'm taking more classes than last semester so the fridge will likely be lacking in hearty meals and but full of condiments and you know what that means...
















I heard a rumour that this time of year makes everyone feel a bit funny.

When in self-doubt, hang out with real friends and instead of creating imaginary ones that always rule and never hurt your feelings.




















OKAY??


LATER GATORS!